The Gold Toothed Thief

Hi everyone ! Its September now which means I’ve made it 14 months away from home. Can you believe it? At times it went sloooow, but then some months went so fast that I barely remember what happened.

(If you are Connor’s mom and reading this, he hasn’t bathed in a week. He’s really let himself go and we’re all concerned. He ate fried chicken and pancakes this morning if that tells you anything. )

This weekend I attended the Umhlanga Ceremony. I was able to see the King and his family. He picks his wives at this ceremony and announces it at her family’s surprise. I tried to be lucky #14 this year, but didn’t get the chance to introduce myself to him. Plus, his animal skin skirt can be intimidating. The ceremony was so fun and rich with culture and tradition. Over 80,000 girls danced in their traditional clothes and I got a lot of good pictures. The princesses were there and the new Miss Swaziland. My friends and I were shoved by a security lady while trying to get a picture…it was awesome. I got a good pic. I think they thought I was with the press so they let me stay down there with the news reporters. That was the great part of this week…

Bad news also occurred this weekend. I took a khombi (a white Scooby Doo looking public transport van commonly used by Swazis and with an array of names on the windshield like “the cutter” and “the solution”) back to the city to sleep that night. We entered the bus rank at night singing to the Beyonce remixes that the khombi driver was playing and we got out in the empty gravel parking lot. I could barely see since it was night and the stars gave us the only light while removing our things from the van. As I looked for my purse in the midst of the pile of stuff we had in the middle of the abandoned parking lot, I noticed it was missing. The khombi was turning around and preparing to leave, so as it began to accelerate I ran after it in a dress and flip flop. Sadly, I ate dust and the red glow of my face from the brake lights were not enough for them to see me behind them. I chased them down a hill and into the night while a group of Swazi teenagers laughed at my misfortune while I inhaled the exhaust of the van of which was taking my identity 30 miles north. Without a car to follow them, any idea what the driver looked like, a registration number, or even the name of the conductor, I walked with my friends with my head held low to our friends’ apartment. I called Peace Corps security, but they didn’t offer money and to get home. I was so mad that I didn’t double check the van before getting out. The contents of my purse included: E800 ($90), Peace Corps badge to get in to PC Headquarters, credit cards (Swazi and American), pin numbers of both (…I have reasoning for it), and finally…my passport. As far as that moment was concerned, I didn’t exist. I was Bourne Identity. I was Jason Bourne.
The next morning my friend came with me to the bus rank to see if we could remember anything about the conductor or driver or what the khombi even looked like to see if by any miracle (more than a hundred buses and khombis are in the bus rank) we could find them. We asked everyone who could speak English if they knew of a khombi that drove through around 7pm the night before and had a conductor with a gold tooth. They would look at me and say, “…Sisi, everyone has a gold tooth here.” I realized how ridiculous I probably sounded asking for a guy with a gold tooth all morning. I looked around and made eye contact with an old man who winked at me with a smug grin. A big enough grin to see his gold tooth glisten. The man was right. There was no hope. My eyes began to water as I stood in the middle of a busy bus rank, people yelling and carrying chickens, and enough gold teeth to satisfy King Tut in the southern edges of South Africa. I felt helpless. Just as began to give up a lady came and said, “Are you a Peace Corps Volunteer?” Confused I answered, “Yes?” My friend and I looked at each other wondering what was going on. She said, “I found some things last night here by the South African khombis.” I jumped for joy, but I was scared for what she found. She said, “I have two plastic cards and a passport.” I knew it. It would be too much to ask for everything. I’m know private eye detective, but I’ve concluded that they drove back later threw my cards and passport out the window into the parking lot and kept the cash and purse to go through KFC or something. Well, went through KFC a lot of times. Well, probably will be able to go through KFC for the rest of the month. It’s so sad, but I learned my lesson. I’m just thankful I was able to get the cards back and my passport and PC Government badge to get back into the headquarters. It was a bizarre weekend and I was ready to go home by the time Sunday rolled in.
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I have a month left of training for a half marathon. Some of you may not believe it and at times I’m with you on that, but I am registering this week and buying the plane ticket to run in Cape Town, South Africa so whether or not I believe it or not…its going to happen. I’ve barely ran more than 6k my whole life…altogether…and I’m expected to run 21.5k in a month. I’m nervous, but so excited. I’m going with my two Texan friends, Hong and Lisa. We are going to try see a lot of stuff like Robin Island (Nelson Mandela’s prison), the penguins, vineyards and wine tasting, and go to the beach where the Indian Ocean and Atlantic intersect. It gives me motivation to run because I know if I go there to run I will get to do a lot more than that. 


I’m staying busy this month. I am helping the support groups in my area start an income generating project. We are doing shoe making skills with HIV+ members to earn money and start businesses. It’s this coming Monday and really hope it’s a success. I got funding from the US government to pay for the transport, food, and a teacher. The interested members (around 35 people, 2 from each surrounding support group) are going to buy their own materials and learn with them so that they can use it to teach the others in their support groups and sell it for profit. The can then use the money earned to buy more materials and will have a little left over for saving. It should be fun and a good way to meet more members of my community I’m living in.

Lastly, I’m preparing for a very large workshop at the end of this month. It’s to teach outreach to pastors (80 people) for two days to people who are HIV+. Mostly how to outreach to people in general whether physically (offering support groups), emotionally (through counseling), or spiritually (prayer meetings). I’m excited but I have a lot of work to do to prepare. They are sleeping over too so a lot of food and accommodation preparation need to take place still. Funding is still in the works and meanwhile I’m trying to get ready for my half marathon and make reservations in Cape Town. Miss you guys! I would love to talk with you if you ever have time to write or call. I will need someone to talk to this month to keep me sane.  Enjoy the new school year!